Excuses

( the old stand by: I didn't have time) here is a list so you can be more creative.


It doesn't matter what you say to me, it matters what you say to yourself.

I'd love to but...

I'd love to, but having fun gives me prickly heat.
I'd love to, but I changed the lock on my door; now I can't get out.
I'd love to, but I did my own thing, and now I've got to undo it.
I'd love to, but I don't want to leave my 0zone.
I'd love to, but I feel a song coming on.
I'd love to, but I have left my body in my other clothes.
I'd love to, but I have some hard words to look up in the dictionary.
I'd love to, but I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.
I'd love to, but I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.
I'd love to, but I have to bleach my hare.
I'd love to, but I have to check freshness dates on my diary products.
I'd love to, but I have to draw "Cubby" for an art scholarship.
I'd love to, but I have to floss my cat.
I'd love to, but I have to fluff my shower cap.
I'd love to, but I have to fulfill my destiny.
I'd love to, but I have to feed my Ongbun.
I'd love to, but I have to go to court for kitty littering.
I'd love to, but I have to jog my memory.
I'd love to, but I have to knit dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.
I'd love to, but I have to rotate my crops.
I'd love to, but I have to sit up with a sick ant.
I'd love to, but I have to stay home and see if I snore.
I'd love to, but I have to study for a blood test.
I'd love to, but I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.
I'd love to, but I have too much guilt.
I'd love to, but I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.
I'd love to, but I never go out on days that end in "Y".
I'd love to, but I prefer to remain an enigma.
I'd love to, but I promised to help a friend fold road maps.
I'd love to, but I think you want the other Lump.
I'd love to, but I want to spend more time with my blender.
I'd love to, but I'll be looking for a parking space for December.
I'd love to, but I'm attending a perfume convention as guest sniffer.
I'd love to, but I'm attending the opening of my garage door.
I'd love to, but I'm being deported.
I'd love to, but I'm building a pig from a kit.
I'd love to, but I'm converting my calendar from Julian to Gregorian.
I'd love to, but I'm doing door-to-door collecting for belly button lint.
I'd love to, but I'm enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.
I'd love to, but I'm getting my overalls overhauled.
I'd love to, but I'm giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.
I'd love to, but I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdraw.
I'd love to, but I'm going to be old someday soon.
I'd love to, but I'm going to count the bristled in my toothbrush.
I'd love to, but I'm having all my plants neutered.
I'd love to, but I'm having my baby shoes bronzed.
I'd love to, but I'm in training to be a household pest.
I'd love to, but I'm observing National Apathy Week.
I'd love to, but I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves.
I'd love to, but I'm sandblasting my neighbor's oven.
I'd love to, but I'm seeing how long I can go without saying yes.
I'd love to, but I'm taking punk totem pole carving.
I'd love to, but I'm teaching my ferret to yodel.
I'd love to, but I'm too old for that stuff.
I'd love to, but I'm too young for that stuff.
I'd love to, but I'm touring China with a wok band.
I'd love to, but I'm trying to be less popular.
I'd love to, but I'm trying to cut down.
I'd love to, but I'm uncomfortable when I'm alone or with others.
I'd love to, but I'm up to my elbows in waxy buildup.
I'd love to, but I'm waiting to see if I'm already a winner.
I'd love to, but I'm working on my cottage cheese sculpture.
I'd love to, but I'm worried about my left foot.
I'd love to, but I'm writing a love letter to Al Gore.
I'd love to, but I'm writing a sex note to Richard Simmons.
I'd love to, but I've been scheduled for a karma transplant.
I'd love to, but I've dedicated my life to linguini.
I'd love to, but I've got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.
I'd love to, but it's my parakeet's bowling night.
I'd love to, but it's too close to the turn or the century.
I'd love to, but my bathroom tiles need grouting.
I'd love to, but my crayons all melted together.
I'd love to, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
I'd love to, but my mother would never let me hear the end of it.
I'd love to, but my palm reader advised against it.
I'd love to, but my patent is pending.
I'd love to, but my plot to take over the world is thickening.
I'd love to, but my subconscious says no way.
I'd love to, but my uncle escaped again.
I'd love to, but my ex-wife would never let me hear the end of it.
I'd love to, but my yucca plant is feeling yucky.
I'd love to, but none of my socks match.
I'd love to, but the last time I went, I never came back.
I'd love to, but the man on television told me to stay tuned.
I'd love to, but the President said he might drop in.
I'd love to, but there are world issues that need worrying about.
I'd love to, but there's a disturbance in the Force.
I'd love to, but you know how we psychos behave in igloos.
I'd love to, but I am overdrawn at the blood bank.
I'd love to, but I never say yes.